It could not have been more coincidental. An exact-time-exact-place sort of thing; I found her with another guy at a McDonald’s across the hotel I was staying. I turned around just as she saw me and ran for the door never to see her again. And just like that we split up, the only love story I would ever come to tell.
Five years hence and I am yet to find that girl for whom I could invest a similar level of emotion as the last one. Even if you don’t want to it’s hard not to compare. Highschool and college was already memorable in itself; all these memories are bound to be connected to her – friends and experiences. Nobody said moving on was gonna be easy… but the biggest, craziest hurdle came from when I re-entered the dating pool:
- Women are the most vicious creatures in the planet, they want you to portray a male version of themselves.
- Half of the women who fornicate with you have already thought of the wedding.
- All the quiet women are taken. Most who are left are either loud or dramatic.
- Men are innately stupid brought by the lack of Mitochondrial DNA.
- Women will say “awwwww” for every unique way you tell them you love them. This forces you to be creative.
- Women who do not love flowers are hypocrites.
- Even women who ask to be slapped need to be respected. It’s called Political Correctness.
- A woman will ask a question to convey a command. Example: when she asks “does this wall need to be repainted?” She actually means “You should repaint this wall now.”
- Women compare…
- If a woman likes you, she will always agree to whatever you say. When you get together though, the roles have to change.
Oh and did you hear.. Happyslip sold out! Lolz!